Getting Lit Ep09: How to Marry a Millionaire Vampire

Getting Lit Ep09: How to Marry a Millionaire Vampire

By Kerrelyn Sparks. Special guest host Heidi!


“Edward Cullen makes me want to drink.”

“The unliving wage.”

“I think I have Stockholm Syndrome about Stockholm Syndrome.”

“That is good use of a sex doll there… in terms of other stuff…”

Ilana’s Drink: Chocoblood

Ilana made a drink based on a fictional drink in the book, Chocoblood. It’s supposed to be a chocolate and blood fusion so good it was making women vampires fat.


  • 2 shots irish cream
  • 2 shots creme de cacao
  • 1 shot cheap vodka (because with all this how are you going to tell)
  • 1 shot grenadine syrup
  • 3 raspberries
  • A squeeze of chocolate syrup
  • iceShake the everything but the raspberries in a cocktail shaker and add the raspberries.

Wendy’s Rant:

Why are vampires so rich??

Books we mentioned:


Next month’s book:

The Amish Widwife

by Mindy Starns Clark

Getting Lit Ep08: Immortal Cowboy

Getting Lit Ep08: Immortal Cowboy

By Alexis Morgan.


“What are kids these days doing with dry ice?” “…Spookifying EVERYTHING.”

“I like to think of this as a suspense novel about a very troubled young woman.”


Ilana’s Drink: Ghost Cowboy

Corona Beer
Shot of Tequilla
Half a Lime Juice, plus another half to garnish
Little bit of Dry Ice

You can’t drink it while the dry ice is still bubbling, but you can make woOoOo sounds!

Wendy’s Rant:

Fuckin’ fairies, man…

Books we mentioned:

  • Rivers of London by  Ben Aaronovitch
  • White Working Class by Joan C. Williams
  • Feminist Fight Club by Jessica Bennett
  • Lady Pirate by Lynsay Sands
  • Knave of Hearts by Elizabeth Boyle
  • Born of Ice by Sherrilyn Kenyon
  • The Hidden Legacy series by Ilona Andrews
  • Movies: High Spirits, Ghost


Next month’s book:

How to Marry a Millionaire Vampire

by Kerrelyn Sparks

Getting Lit Ep 07: Tender Wings of Desire

Getting Lit Ep 07: Tender Wings of Desire

By Harland Sanders. Special guest star: Matt, Ilana’s husband!



“Aw, you guys are like The Notebook for nerds.”

“You go from dating guys named Glen to dating in glens.”

“Never say ‘fleshy tubules’ again.”

Ilana’s Drink

Getting Lit time! In honor of our reading of the infamous Tender Wing of Desire: A Colonel Sanders Novella, I made a twin cocktail of tea related beverages, putting into a KFC cup and garnished with a bit of fried chicken. Despite bad presentation, I think the combined result is one of the best cocktails I’ve ever made

Side One: Sweet Harland
1 shot scotch
1 shot lemon juice
1 shot simple syrup
3/4 KFC Sweet Tea

Side Two: Dearest Madeline
2 shots dry gin
1 shot simple syrup
1 shot lime
4 shots brewed Darjeeling Tea

Create each cocktail and shake with ice. Let the two cocktails blend together for maximum effect.


Wendy’s Rant:

Signs You Are Dating a Romance Hero


Other Books We Mentioned:

Banana: the Fate of the Fruit That Changed the World by Dan Koeppel

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey

When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi

White Hot by Ilona Andrews

Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry


Next Book:

Immortal Cowboy by Alexis Morgan

Harlequin Nocturne #182, Vampire #6

Getting Lit Ep 06: Clean Sweep

Getting Lit Ep 06: Clean Sweep


Oh man, I’m so excited about that.


Highlights of this episode:

“I’ll just single fist for now, thanks.”

“Should I make a threesome joke? The answer is always yes.”

“Fairies and elves can go fuck themselves.”

“Please quote me to myself.”


Ilana’s Drink: Silver Fizz

Ilana takes a classic and puts a subtle twist to it. There are lots of wolfy levels to this cocktail, since 1) it’s described as a “hair of the dog” type drink 2) it mentions silver 3) the lemon shavings make it look suspiciously like something else wolfy related.

2 ounces gin
1 ounce lemon juice
1 teaspoon superfine sugar 
1 egg white

Shake in a cocktail shaker and strain. Add lemon zest and a slice of lemon if you are fancy.


Books mentioned:

“Ilot” of Ilona Andrews (see what I did there?)

Bayou Moon and Fate’s Edge by Ilona Andrews

Burn for Me by Ilona Andrews

Kate Daniel’s series: 5, 5.5, 4, 3, 3.5, 2, and others

Gulp Adventures of the Alimentary Canal by Mary Roach

Green Island by Shawna Yang Ryan

The Ghost Bride by Yangtzhe Choo

Lord of Scoundrels by Loretta Chase

Buns by Alice Clayton

Till We Have Faces by CS Lewis


You can check out my Full On Squee for Ilona Andrews and rant on Till We Have Faces, mentioned on the podcast.


Next Book: Tender Wings of Desire

By Harland Sanders

Read along with us!

How can you turn down….



Learn more on Goodreads


And if you do in fact want to follow along, you may want to click below at the

Totally Not a Downloadable Copy in .epub

Totally Not a Downloadable Copy in .mobi


Sorry folks, I have no idea what device you are working with, so I don’t know how you would open it to read it. However, I have been before able to open an epub file pretty easily on my Samsung using the Kindle app.


Getting Lit Ep 05: Amish Vampires in Space

Getting Lit Ep 05: Amish Vampires in Space

By Kerry Nietz. Special guest host: Justin Roberts from the podcast All Out of Ideas!

Bonus rant is Vampires vs Werewolves! Which would you choose?


What Ilana’s drinking…

The Scraddlebox

2 shots gin
1 shot lemon juice
1/2 cup Calypso Ocean Blue Lemonade
1/4 cup Ginger Ale
1 Maraschino Cherry
A sprig of Rosemary for fanciness

Muddle the Rosemary, cause you are fancy. Then add all the other things sans cherry. Shake in cocktail shaker with ice because you are still fancy. Add the cherry for extra vampirey flare.


Wendy and Justin are drinking…

Lost Forty Beer

A local Little Rock brewery.

  • Look See Hefeweizen
  • Honey Bock


Books and Shows we talked about:

  • Hag-Seed by Margaret Atwood
  • All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria ReMarque
  • The Underground Railroad by Coleson Whitehead
  • One Dance With a Duke (I said it was A Date with a Duke, but I was wrong) by Tessa Dare
  • When Darkness Comes by Alexandra Ivy
  • Twin Peaks (the show)
  • Jane Austen (generally)
  • Kate Daniels series by Ilona Andrews


Tune in next month when we talk about Clean Sweep by Ilona Andrews!


PODCAST: Getting Lit, Ep 04: The Iron Duke

PODCAST: Getting Lit, Ep 04: The Iron Duke

In this episode, Wendy and Ilana meet IRL in St. Louis, Mo. to talk about the Iron Duke by Meljean Brook, realize they have the perfect professions for romance novel protagonists, and define VILF.

The drink this time is 3 Buck Chuck (a bottle each) because we are out of town and for once in the vicinity of a Trader Joe’s.

Touristy things we did:

  • City Museum
  • Contemporary Art Museum
  • Forest Park
  • St. Louis Art Museum
  • Mau Haus Cat Cafe
  • Mission Taco Joint
  • Gus’s Fried Chicken
  • Hi Pointe Drive In
  • The Dark Room

Books we talk about:

  • Larissa Ione’s Demonica Series
  • Magic Strikes, Kate Daniels Series by Ilona Andrews
  • Fool Me Twice by Meredith Duran (the one with the VILF)
  • An American Sickness: How Healthcare Became Big Business and How You Can Take It Back by Elisabeth Rosenthal


My phone made this for me automatically and we thought it was so awesome we had to share.


For your viewing pleasure: Mulan “mulaning”.